Rather, Exclusively Dateable

So I've received a lot of concerned comments from friends since I started the Undateable series of posts.

It is a joke.

Yesterday, an especially sweet friend chided me, telling me I am rather, actually, "exclusively dateable."

Let's clear the air: I'm not fishing for compliments. I'm not filled with despair or low self-esteem. I'm not doomed to never date again (should I ever choose to, my choice!).

I will illustrate how I mean this, with a real world example. I actually had this dilemma yesterday.

You realize the outfit you want to wear calls for two pairs of hands to get dressed. A roommate or significant other to ask, "Hey! Can you help me zip this?" 

You get it half zipped. You're stuck. 

Do you:

A. Burst into tears while yanking the dress back over your head, breaking the zipper, opting for a different option better suited for your spinsterhood.

B. Shrug, throw on a cardigan, planning on pulling a friend into the ladies' room to help you out once at the office.

C. Think about it for a moment, breathe, remember you are flexible enough through your shoulders and calmly zip that shit yourself.

My answer is C.

I'm not undateable in that I am a horrible, annoying, intolerable person by any means. I'm "undateable" in that I am too independent. Assertive. Confident. Ambitious. Outspoken. And generally intimidating.

I solve my own problems. I will never be a damsel in distress.

Essentially, I would make one hell of a bachelor. 

Posted on January 29, 2014 and filed under Dating.